Jump

I spent the last two years learning how to love, not just the love of a man for a woman but also the love of man for humanity, for god, for life, and for spirituality. It hasn’t been a perfect journey, I have stumbled along the way, fallen into the pit of expectation and prerequision. I have made a woman my god and worshiped on the altar of pain and separation. I have made money my god; crucified on the cross of lack I suffered great pain. And finally I have made god, my god, saved in the ever-lasting light of the spirit, and the joy of mankind. You may think that it is strange that a love poem would have god in it, but this is not the case. Descartes made a prove of the existence of god by the fact that he could not imagine a triangle who’s three sides don’t add up to 180 degrees, and he could also not imagine a world without god. I make the argument that love is the direct human proof that god exists because without god there can be no love. God makes love possible. It is the idea that god loves you unconditionally that makes loving others unconditionally possible. It is the idea that god will carry you though life that makes real trust in others possible. It is the idea that life has purpose that makes giving possible.

At this point you are probably thinking that this is the strangest love poem you have ever heard. But I know that it is the purest love poem that can be written. In life I have learned that the degree that I can love is directly proportional to the degree that I can trust in god. With trust, I can love without prerequisite. With trust I can love without judgment. With trust I can love with open hands, giving without expectation of return. I write this love poem now, because I have embarked on the most sacred journey of love, the love for another human being, with intimacy, and depth. At first I was afraid, would she love me back, would she change her mind, would she leave, and would she stop loving me. Then in a moment of clarity I realized that it’s none of my business. The task of loving is and always will simply love. Then in a flash I realized.

Love is something you do regardless of the other.

Love is giving without expectation of return.

Love has no time limit.

Love does not need Love returned.

Love is.

Looking at my newfound love, trusting in my god. I step away from the deep dark chasm of expectation and prerequisite, and jump into the abyss of love.